What a Week That Was…

Hello. Jet here.

Apparently Mum says the last week has been “a bit busy.”

This is what humans say when they mean:

everything happened at once.

We had parcels.

We had books.

We had visitors.

We had walks.

We had secrets.

We had a new family member.

And we had Mum sitting at a laptop at half past two in the morning looking as though she was one wrong margin setting away from launching the computer through the window.

So.

A normal week, then.

🐟 First… Walter Arrived

After what felt like approximately seventeen years of waiting, Walter finally arrived.

Walter is a fish.

Not just any fish.

A Siamese Fighting Fish.

Which sounds dramatic.

He is, admittedly, quite dramatic.

He has his own tank.

His own food.

His own lighting system.

His own water parameters.

And Mum speaks to him in a voice she usually reserves for puppies and people who have just had surgery.

I watched all of this very carefully.

I am not jealous.

I simply feel there should be a clear hierarchy in the house.

And that hierarchy should have me at the top.

Obviously.

Walter, to be fair, is settling in nicely.

His colours are already starting to show more and he seems quite happy in his kingdom.

He didn’t even seem to mind when I licked the glass, and I do press my nose up against it at regular intervals.

Mum has informed us all that he prefers to live alone.

Kevin said that sounded sensible.

I said Kevin should consider it.

📚 Then There Was The Book…

(I am not allowed to show you ANYTHING connected to it just now).

The new book… that nobody knows anything about!

Mum has spent a ridiculous amount of time this week working on a brand-new book.

Not one of mine.

I know.

Shocking!

This one is something completely different.

It is for younger readers and is all about the countryside, animals, farms, responsibility, and why people need to think about what they are doing when they are out exploring.

There have been lots of pictures.

Lots of changes.

Lots of checking.

Lots of muttering.

And one very late night involving page sizes and margins.

I stayed close by for support.

By “support” I mean I slept.

Upside down.

In the middle of the night.

But I was there.

Eventually, the manuscript was finished.

Uploaded.

And we went to bed.

The new manuscript has now been proofread and age-approved, and three author copies have duly been ordered.

At that point Mum made tea.

Which is her version of emotional recovery.

🏰 We Also Escaped The Office

There was a trip to Culzean Castle too.

Very civilised.

Very scenic.

Very many photographs.

Mum says going out for a walk helps clear her head.

What actually happens is she clears one idea out and replaces it with four new ones.

We had lunch there too, which was lovely.

Mum bought a new hat and also looked at a smart new collar for me with a plaid bow tie on it for special days and meetings.

But apparently I am too fluffy.

Also, it cost an awful lot of money.

So we decided I could do without it and the money saved would go into my ostrich bone savings pot instead.

A sensible financial decision, if you ask me.

Still, I approve of any activity involving fresh air, hills and potential snacks.

🩺 There Was Also A Vet Visit

I would like it formally recorded that not every vet visit is about me.

Unfortunately, this one was.

And my visit this week was a little traumatic.

I growled at Ian the vet.

Just warning him to be careful, that was all.

Mum was shocked.

She has never heard me growl at a human before.

Then the lovely nurse said I had put on a few extra pounds.

Oops.

Too many Jet treats, Mum says.

She is now calling me Porky Paws.

I feel this is unnecessary.

Possibly defamatory.

Meanwhile, Mum had things to do, people to see, books to talk about, and somewhere along the way even more plans appeared.

This is how it works around here.

One small job goes in.

Five new jobs come out.

🦚 Kevin Continues To Be Kevin

Kevin has spent the week shouting at things.

Cars.

Vans.

People.

Weather.

Possibly a leaf.

He has now been given his own Sunday feature.

This is called Kevin’s Sunday Sqwack.

I did object.

Mum ignored me.

Apparently he is now “Head of Communications.”

He is not.

He is a peacock with opinions.

There is a difference.

His first Kevin’s Sunday Sqwack email went out on Sunday evening.

He now feels he should be signing autographs and booking himself in for pedicures.

Things have gone to his head.

🐾 And Somehow… We Kept Going

That is the funny thing about weeks like this.

At the start, everything looks impossible.

Too many jobs.

Too many tabs open.

Too many things half-finished.

Then somehow, bit by bit, things get done.

A fish settles in.

A book gets finished.

A page goes live.

A walk gets taken.

A cup of tea gets made.

And the chaos starts looking a little bit like progress.

Mum says there is another very busy week ahead.

I am choosing not to think about that yet.

For now, I am going to lie on my back with my paws in the air and enjoy the fact that we survived this one.

Barely.

Until next time,

Love and slobbery kisses,

Jet 🐾